I left NYC in April 2021 to begin my private equity career in LA, not knowing the transformative experience that awaited me. Now, I am back home in NYC to begin a new chapter of my life and career (more on that soon). Before I turn the page, I want to share my reflections of my time in LA.
My blogging hobby took an inadvertent hiatus after 2021. Professionally, work became hectic as the macro environment took a somber turn from the highs of 2021. Personally, it was a period of deep reflection – and at moments, a bit of an identity crisis – as I reevaluated what I wanted, who I was becoming, and what kind of life felt aligned with me.
TLDR? My time in LA was truly a turning point in my life that brought me clarity, confidence, and a deeper understanding of what I value both professionally and personally. Oh – and NYC is so much better than LA. I said what I said – sorry, not sorry!
As a quick recap, I was an investment banking analyst in NYC from 2018-2021 before moving to LA. After being stuck in my apartment throughout all of COVID, I started to wonder if there was more to life outside of NYC. Like most analysts, I recruited for private equity and received offers for both NYC and LA. Desperately craving a change, I chose the LA opportunity. Do I regret that choice today even though I came back to NYC? Actually, I do not. Here’s why:
- Mobility is a unique privilege that I’m able to enjoy as a young, single person. I had the rare opportunity to make a big move without many strings attached. I knew this freedom wouldn’t last forever, and I wanted to take advantage of it while I could.
- My curiosity about life outside NYC needed to be satisfied. If I had stayed, I would have always wondered “what if.” This experience helped me move past that.
- Immersing yourself in a new environment is a great way to learn about yourself. Even though I moved around a lot growing up, it was eye-opening to see how I acclimated to new challenges and settings as an adult. This experience created space for personal reflection and helped me understand what I prioritize in life.
I moved to LA with a very open mind, but I knew there was a good chance I would eventually return to NYC since I had no personal connection to LA and NYC had always felt like home.
That said, I actually loved my first year in LA. There was so much to explore. It was vastly different from all the places I had lived before. I had my own car and was in close proximity to the beach. In retrospect, I think I was just enjoying the novelty of a west coast lifestyle after being burned out in NYC during COVID.
As the novelty wore off, so did my enthusiasm. These are the main reasons that I did not love LA:
Reason 1: I felt the absence of my friends and community. I went to college and spent my entire adult life on the east coast, so none of my close friends were in California. I also found it very difficult to meet people with similar interests in LA, especially considering my long hours, how spread out the city is, and the logistics of planning, driving, and finding parking. In LA, I often had to schedule plans days or weeks in advance, whereas in NYC I could very easily meet someone the same day or the next.
Reason 2: The LA finance landscape is extremely limited. It’s not insignificant, but it is definitely nowhere near the scale of Midtown Manhattan. The way I illustrated it to my friends is that you can take a top-down approach to find a finance job in NYC, but you have to take the bottoms up approach in LA – meaning that in NYC, you can start by picking your criteria for an opportunity and you are likely to find one that is a close or perfect match, but in LA, you work with what’s available and make the best of a smaller pool of options. As my career interests evolved, I felt like I was doing myself a professional disservice by staying in LA.
Reason 3: General cultural incompatibility. I’ve heard people say that “people in NYC are kind but not nice, and LA people are nice but not kind” and that “NYC’s love language is acts of service, whereas LA’s is words of affirmation.” I wholeheartedly agree with these statements. After being told by several people that I am “very New York,” I realized that my energy just did not mesh with LA, even in a high finance environment. LA just was not the right cultural fit for me – and that’s okay.
Reason 4: The reality of living in LA is VERY different from how it’s portrayed. The weather is actually gray and rainy most of the time – LA actually received more rain than Seattle the past couple of years. While I try not to get political, I found the city’s handling of crime, homelessness, and even the LA fires, frustrating and disheartening. On a lighter (but still serious) note: LA bagels just do not compare to NYC bagels. You really need NYC water to make good bagels.
I realize I’ve been pretty critical of LA in this post, but there were positive aspects to my time there.
- I stepped out of my comfort zone. Moving to a completely new city where I didn’t know anyone pushed me to do things differently. It was hard for me to find the same kinds of people I hung out with in NYC, but that opened the door to connect with people from different walks of life and professional backgrounds which was refreshing in its own way.
- I became softer and more relaxed. According to my friends, I “loosened up” a lot from my prior NYC days – and honestly, I agree. The more laid-back California culture helped round out some of my sharp New York edges.
- I became a pretty decent driver. I had my license since college but never drove on the east coast, so I had to retake driving lessons once I got to LA. It was encouraging to hear my NYC friends’ commentary on my driving each time they visited me. In my first year, they told me I drove like a 16 year old with a freshly issued permit. By the time I left, they told me I was ready for the New Jersey freeway. If that isn’t the best compliment, I don’t know what is.
All in all, my California chapter was difficult but necessary – it gave me perspective, resilience, and clarity about what truly matters to me. The person I was when I left California is much deeper and stronger than the person I was four years ago. What I want for myself and my career is completely different now than four years ago, and I don’t think I would have been able to find my path if it weren’t for my time in LA.
And now, back in NYC, I’m stepping into that new vision… more on that soon.
For those who read my blog, thank you for your continued support and for following me on my career and life journey. Let’s continue to learn and grow together.
Thank you for reading,
Phyllis
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